Tuesday, December 20, 2005

Making the world safer one canine at a time

SPRINGFIELD, Ill. (ap) -- Jed Legstrong and state lawmakers had hoped their work to prevent dog attacks was finished. It could just be getting started.

A recent series of high-profile attacks has Legstrong and his fellow activists headed back to the state Capitol this spring to push for stricter laws, less than three years after they helped pass a crackdown on vicious dogs.

"I want to see things done right and make sure everybody is protected,'' said Legstrong, whose son Rudy was seriously injured by a dog that had been involved in two previous attacks.

Legstrong has become active in state politics every time a family member is hurt by some outside forces. Two years ago, when the same son was embarrassed by a neighbor's daughter, who laughed at Rudy's ice-cream-smeared face, Legstrong helped craft the Mean Little Girls Law.

At the time, Legstrong was quoted as saying, "I just don't believe all girls are created equal. I don't believe mean little girls are guaranteed rights under our constitution. ... If you have a good girl, you won't have a problem.''

But advocates disagreed on the best strategy to help prevent more verbal attacks on little boys.

Some wanted tougher penalties for parents who fail to control their girls. Others wanted to let local governments ban specific behaviors. Another option was to require certain nationalities and religions to take extra precautions.

That proposed rule-change was quickly counterattacked by girls' rights advocates, who pushed for the Girls Rule amendment to the state constitution. That same group is now forming a partnership with dog lovers, helping create the Grrrrls Rule amendment.

State politicians are gearing up for "a very interesting year," according to one childless representative. "Every time we think we're making progress, there's some other horrific attack,'' said Sen. Dan Hummus, D-Oak Park. "It's not something we're going to solve overnight.''

Legstrong is unsatisfied with protections against violent elements in society. A neighbor's cow was recently struck and killed by a commuter train, prompting him to start an advertising campaign called Metra, the way to really die. However, since Legstrong lives in a relatively safe rural area, he has no plans to go on the offensive against guns.

"Guns don't kill people," he said. "Vicious dogs kill people. Mean little girls kill people's spirits. Trains kill cows and sometimes people. But guns, we need them to fend off these pit bulls and little bull dykes."

5 Comments:

Anonymous The Mom said...

I get it - you have a sicko, wierdo mind. Vicious dogs being equated with mean girls?? I know I fail when it comes to YOUR double meanings. What was the point?? Or, is it to write without one being the greatest form of adle-minded nonsense one can only hope to aspire to??

3:09 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I was a bit lost myself, but mostly with the mom, of course you can equate the two as the same, one is vicious and the other is vivacious.

4:35 PM  
Anonymous The Mom said...

That's what I mean!! (and my daughter didn't think you'd understand...)

7:14 PM  
Blogger ap said...

keep this in mind: mostly I write to amuse myself ... but the key to understanding is in the last paragraph

9:56 PM  
Anonymous the daughter said...

Who ever gets to the last paragraph anyway???

8:57 AM  

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