Wednesday, January 25, 2006

What will the electricity auction look like?

News item: The Illinois Commerce Commission approved a controversial auction as the way consumers will get electricity in 2007. At the same time, the commission warned that electricity rates are bound to rise.

Scenario 1: traditional

Auctioneer: "Do I hear fifty dollars for this month's electric bill?"

(bidder A raises number card)

Auctioneer: "I have fifty dollars, do I hear sixty dollars? Last year it cost twenty, so how about sixty?"

(bidder B raises number card)

Auctioneer: "Sixty dollars ... sixty ... looking for eighty ... eighty dollars. Ladies and gentlemen, I have a whole month's supply of gen-u-ine e-lec-tricity for your home. Make some popcorn in your microwave, see at night with the miracle of electricity, do I hear eighty dollars?"

(bidder ComEd finally decides not to pass and raises card)

Auctioneer: "I have eighty dollars! Eighty to the bidder in the back. Eighty, do I hear a hundred? One hundred dollars?"

(no bidders raise their cards)

Auctioneer: "I have eighty dollars. Going once, going twice, going for the third and final time ... (long pause) SOLD! to bidder ComEd for eighty dollars. The next item is cable service ..."

Scenario 2: ebay

price: US $289.00
Time left: 1 day 17 hours
10-day listing, Ends Jan-26-06 21:42:14 PST
Start time: Jan-16-06 21:42:14 PST
Quantity: 8 available
History: Purchases
Item location: ComEd nuclear plants all over the place
Ships to: Suckers in Illinois, United States
Shipping costs: Seller will determine how much to charge for delivery of this valuable item


Image of auction from Toothpaste for Dinner.

3 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Electricity is our friend"

Indeed. Our very expensive friend.

Like a childhood friend from the old neighborhood whose dad hit it big one day at the law firm, so they moved out of Mt. Greenwood and in to Barrington. Years later you run into him, and he scoffs at the the Member's Only jacket you are wearing.

Yes, what was once a simple act, like turning on a light in a closet, will now results in class warfare. Thank you Springfield!

I hope the chick with her hair standing straight on end is getting herself a nice rush, becuase that same rush produced by a hit of heroin would probably be cheaper.

3:10 PM  
Anonymous he said she said...

now if only they could deliver the heroin to our house as efficiently as they bring in those small little electrons.

4:35 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

I didn't realize heroin is cheaper than electricity. When Illinois deregulates, that's what I'm switching to!

5:15 PM  

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