Uh-oh ... They've figured out my blogging formula

It's a little after 5 a.m., and I can't sleep. I'm bothered by something I heard on the news last night that linked sarcasm to anger. I won't be able to fall back asleep until I figure out what the hell they were talking about. A google search results in a link to the Boston University Faculty & Staff Assistance Office, which brings us this quick true/false ANGER quiz:

I am often irritable and cranky. (True!)

I am on guard to keep others from taking advantage of me. (True! Gotta keep my eye on that sneaky Daily Kos guy.)

I have angry outbursts. (True!)

I have been neglecting previously enjoyable activities. (True! Can't remember the last time I shoveled snow.)

I frequently argue with family. (True! Well, only when I talk to them.)

I often feel stressed and pressured, or in a rush. (True! How many more damn questions?!)

I often feel unfairly treated or disrespected. (True! No love.)

I think a lot about how to retaliate when I have been criticized. (True! Still thinking about how to get back at the high school teacher that gave me a B- in creative writing. He might be dead, but I WILL find his grave.)

It's hard for me to wait in my car while students are crossing the street and not paying attention to traffic. (True! Especially handicapped kids.)

People avoid me at work or at home. (True! True!)

Sometimes I have been so angry I have wanted to hit someone. (True! Well, I've wanted to hit them with some rude remark. Hit 'em hard.)

When I am not fighting with my (partner, family member), I am fighting with someone at work. (True! Preferred form of fighting: Sumo ... wearing the fat suit.)

When someone cuts me off in traffic, I am enraged. (True! But I usually get even. At least in my mind.)

If you answered true to 3 or more statements, you may benefit from talking to someone about learning to manage your anger blog.

OK, I can go back to sleep now.